Meet 8 MetaSlavs First-Hand
MetaSlavs mint dates taking place on 17 and 19 December are closer than ever. Now’s your time to find out all the bells and whistles about 8 MetaSlav Gopniks, straight from Metaslavia!
Getting in a bar brawl in 1975 has led Vladimir to the Kazan gulag. Fancy a discussion on religion in the Soviet times of the 70s? Well, can’t miss doing time in a gulag, comrade.
During his sentence, Vladimir basically introduced face tattoos to other prisoners — a long time before it became mainstream in the trap rap scene… A true inventor and a visionary! Nowadays, he can be seen squatting at his farmer market stand selling Soviet memorabilia.
No footwear — don’t care! Stanislav “The Barefoot” never actually liked sneakers (not even Adidas). As a little Gopnik, his dedushka would always say how walking on Metaslavia soil with an interference (such as a sole) makes you somewhat less physically connected to that glorious country.
Since then, Stanislav has defended the colors of Metaslavia by not wearing any footwear. A true patriot, indeed.
A former Spetznaz Ground Force soldier Pyotr has many stories to tell. During the Soviet-Afghan war, Pyotr has fought both Rambo and Chuck Norris. Do you still wonder why their careers went sideways in the 90s? Comrade Pyotr has shown them the true power of the Soviet Special Forces.
In recent years of retirement, Pyotr grows his own potatoes, tells his grandchildren bedtime stories, and makes the best borscht from Lviv to Vladivostok. A true hero focused on putting his family first!
Every similarity with the, unfortunately, the late famous guy from California is purely coincidental. The turtle neck is Stefan’s distinctive daily wear before it was cool, as babushka always told him that disease always attacks bare necks — promaja especially.
Stefan owns an exclusive Lada tuning garage and driver the most beefed up Lada to date — generating a whopping 700 Davaipower!
Jaroslav is working hard at Reactor Blin, as seen from the bright green work vest. Glowing as bright as Reactor 4 in 1986, you can’t unsee Jaroslav squatting in front of a drugstore or his neighbor’s porch.
A champion at bench-pressing 350 kilograms of Soviet steel, Andrei is also a renowned author of a best-selling book “How To Squat Properly”. It was sold in 9545 copies in the West, making Andrei pop up in all Eastern European media — and has even been introduced to the president of Metaslavia!
Dalibor had a splendid time at his baba’s 98th birthday in Croatia. Judging by the lack of footwear and that mask, the party sent a bit sideways. After midnight, baba’s only wish was to listen to the Kalinka Hardbass edition. And blin, the party stopped in the morning — at the same moment, Dalibor had finished his second bottle of vodka.
The ultimate question still stands — where are Dalibor’s shoes? We might never know.
Michal is a wannabe Jamaican-influenced Hardbass DJ from the Prague suburbs, known by 24 people in total (including his family). The main reason is — Michal’s mix doesn’t suit anybody. During the last DJ set, politsiya arrived at the underground club. When the officers saw there were literally 3 people standing in the club, they took Michal. Why? Because no one should tolerate such sacrilege as mixing Hardbass with other music genres, blin!
Keep in mind that every MetaSlav will have an AI-generated backstory additionally expanded by the Metaslavs team ensuring you’re getting the most unique NFTs to date!